Discover why obstacles jump in your way, why you’re overwhelmed with guilt when things do work out, and what your responsibilities really are.
The problem is you don't know where you fit in but feel guilty for choosing your own life. The issue is you feel contained, unfulfilled, restricted and desperate for creative output. The solution is to release the overwhelm that imagined perfection creates.
During this 30 minute session you will learn:
- Why Obstacles Jump In Your Way
- Why You're Overwhelmed With Guilt
- What Your Responsibilities Really Are
Please do your best to watch/listen to each part in order.
How do you recognise when you’re missing out on your own life?
Every time you go for what you want, it falls flat or you feel a pang of deep guilt.
And you have no idea why.
The question is, where did this programming come from? And should you keep it?
In this episode we are resolving:
Am I Selfish to Want My Own Life?
- why obstacles jump in your way
- why you’re overwhelmed with guilt when things do work out and…
- what your responsibilities really are
First you need to recognise what your own life looks like, because obstacles jump in your way leaving you confused, till eventually feeling it’s just too hard and frustrating.
Then you feel unlucky: you feel that your life doesn’t have enough “meant to be” moments.
You feel torn between a world of what you want and what you feel you’re allowed.
Obstacles jump in your way of your life path, especially your career path because of previous conditioning.
Think of how society has been for many, many years. In the past, men were providers and women nurturers. This unconscious programming has been present and reinforced for many generations.
Think of female ancestors who wanted to break the mould and provide? Or male relatives who wanted to nurture?
What happened to them? Mostly they were ostracised!
In your world today, you’ll still take a gulp when branching out - that gulp is fear - not fear of being capable of stepping into your own life, but fear of whether you’re allowed.
So why are you overwhelmed with guilt?
It doesn’t make logical sense in the modern world. Surely you can do what you want? We live in an abundant, free society. We have more opportunities now than at any other time in history.
So why the guilt?
You feel guilty because you’re worried you’re not adhering to the unconscious rules - the ones set by your male ancestors, but constantly enforced by the females.
Men are the deciders - women are the responders.
It’s unladylike, for instance, to put your needs first.
Women of the past were there to take care of the men, and a man was considered weak, if he wasn’t in charge
Therefore, being in charge of your own life means you’re selfish, and out of sync with survival according to your ancestral past.
So what are your true responsibilities?
The key is to step out of trying to be perfect
What I found I got sucked into for a long time was pleasing everyone but myself.
You end up trying to fit in with others to avoid any possibility of judgement. But it doesn’t work, because then you end up with no personal boundaries.
You find yourself moulded to the rules of the past, yet craving your own chosen life.
So what are three little things you can do to minimise feeling guilty for putting yourself first?
- When obstacles surface, mentally question if they are real obstacles or a fear of disapproval. Assessing from this perspective keeps your inner communication open, realistic, and locked out of other people’s opinions so you can have clear Ideas of your own.
- Before you tell others a plan that is really important to you, write down all the possible objections, then let yourself feel your way through them. Why? Because then, if objections surface, you’ll be able to be less defensive, making it much easier for you to side-step any manipulation from someone who Is used to using your misplaced guilt to get what they want.
- Practise saying NO. It's a boundary. Use it to keep yourself safe, and practice till you no longer feel guilt for using it.