I didn’t really know what I was looking for: I just knew there was something missing in my life.
I felt under-utilised – I had excellent academic qualifications, including a PhD in Biochemistry but I wasn’t using them.
I had made the children and their needs my excuse for not changing. I managed to prevaricate. I told myself, “I’m being a Mum – I’m being really useful,” but I secretly felt guilty at not using my skills.
I didn’t know what to do with my life. I thought: I’m wasting my brain. I’m wasting my education. I want to contribute, but I didn’t know what to do to make the change.
I wasn’t aware of feeling unhappy, as such. It all felt normal . . . till I discovered it wasn’t.
I had no real complaints, other than a vague sense of wanting more. I saw my friends having what seemed to be easy lives, and I couldn’t work out what I was doing wrong. I was very sensitive - so much so that my family had often scolded me for being “too sensitive”.
I did try a phone reading with a psychic I found online. This gave me some insights, but I still felt there was something missing, and I didn’t know how to get to where I wanted to be. Or even quite where that was.
Some years back I attended Inspire – the annual conference for Intuitive-sensitives. I wasn’t entirely sure what to expect, and I was not at all sure it was right for me – my husband thought I was mad, and I couldn’t get my friends to go with me! I thought it might be full of people in wafty skirts with bells!! But somehow I was drawn to try it.
It was a complete revelation - I found a room full of people like me: a safe cocoon.
It was the first time I had ever heard the phrase “intuitive-sensitive” and I realised immediately:
Straightaway I wanted to develop my sensitivity, to find out more about it, and more about myself. I began to learn about my internal world, and it just all made sense, removing fear and uncertainty, and teaching me to trust myself and my intuition.
This came into practical use when I found I had breast cancer. This was a bit of a slap in the face: there was no history of the disease in my family, I had a healthy lifestyle, I was not overweight – it came out of the blue.
I had a dream telling me to get a health check. Previously I would probably have ignored it – now I felt it was my inner world giving me an important message and so I followed my intuition.
Initially, I struggled to make my voice heard.
The doctors told me there was nothing wrong with me, to go away and stop worrying but I knew there was. The work I had done with Heidi gave me the courage to challenge their authority and I insisted on further investigations.
Up till then I had been a people-pleaser, a “good girl” and I would have agreed with the first doctor, and gone away meekly. Now I was able to tell them they were wrong and had to look again.
And it was lucky I did. When I was finally diagnosed they told me it was an aggressive strain of the disease, and if not dealt with promptly, would have spread rapidly and inexorably.
Trusting my intuition and listening to my inner self had saved my life.
My life has changed so much for the better now. I have a job now that I love, and ticks all the boxes on my “want” list - something I didn’t really believe existed. Now I am training as a Nutritional Therapist, working with people and using the qualifications I studied so hard for. Opportunities present themselves and now I listen to my intuition all the time.
My suggestion to people who are feeling a bit lost, or unsure and want to find out more about their intuition is simple: Try it! You have nothing to lose. Have a look at some of Heidi’s online recordings and videos, and take that first step.